Malling Area Golf Society

Euro Tour 2024 - Spain, La Cala

Round One Round Two Round Three Overall Captain's Report

Round One - Campo America

Pos. Player Starting
Front 9 Back 9 Total Finishing
1 Barry England 11 13 18 31 9
2 Gary Kisby 13 15 14 29 12
3 Darren Parker 19 12 16 28 19
4 Tom Millington 11 13 15 28 11
5 Tony Jacobs 27 13 13 26 27
6 Peter Tweddell 19 13 13 26 19
7 Mark Parsons 24 14 12 26 24
8 Chris Lewis 10 16 10 26 10
9 Peter Browning 21 12 13 25 21
10 Paul Damper 17 17 8 25 17
11 Adrian Harvanko 18 13 11 24 18
12 Dave Verga 21 11 12 23 21
13 Steve Farley 42 9 10 19 42
14 Bob Crouch 24 10 7 17 24
15 Owen Callaghan 18 10 5 15 19
16 Ian Rowan 22 6 6 12 24

Lost Balls = 47

Round Two - Campo Europa

Pos. Player Starting
Front 9 Back 9 Total Finishing
1 Peter Browning 21 18 17 35 19
2 Tony Jacobs 27 18 11 29 26
3 Darren Parker 19 15 13 28 19
4 Tom Millington 11 14 13 27 11
5 Gary Kisby 12 13 13 26 12
6 Barry England 9 13 13 26 9
7 Peter Tweddell 19 14 12 26 19
8 Adrian Harvanko 18 19 7 26 18
9 Chris Lewis 10 15 10 25 10
10 Mark Parsons 24 8 15 23 24
11 Dave Verga 21 8 13 21 21
12 Paul Damper 17 5 14 19 17
13 Ian Rowan 24 9 10 19 24
14 Bob Crouch 24 11 8 19 25
15 Steve Farley 42 7 6 13 44
DNS Owen Callaghan 19 - - - 19

Lost Balls = 78

Round Three - Campo Asia

Pos. Player Starting
Front 9 Back 9 Total Finishing
1 Tony Jacobs 26 14 19 33 24
2 Tom Millington 11 17 16 33 10
3 Gary Kisby 12 18 15 33 12
4 Darren Parker 19 16 16 32 19
5 Chris Lewis 10 21 10 31 10
6 Paul Damper 17 16 14 30 17
7 Peter Tweddell 19 15 14 29 19
8 Ian Rowan 24 13 14 27 24
9 Owen Callaghan 19 10 16 26 19
10 Barry England 9 10 15 25 9
11 Steve Farley 44 10 14 24 44
12 Adrian Harvanko 18 12 12 24 18
13 Peter Browning 19 13 11 24 19
14 Dave Verga 21 14 9 23 21
15 Bob Crouch 25 12 9 21 26
16 Mark Parsons 24 12 7 19 26

Lost Balls = 51

Overall - Stableford Points





1 Tom Millington 28 27 33 88
2 Gary Kisby 29 26 33 88
3 Darren Parker 28 28 32 88
4 Tony Jacobs 26 29 33 88
5 Peter Browning 25 35 24 84
6 Chris Lewis 26 25 31 82
7 Barry England 31 26 25 82
8 Peter Tweddell 26 26 29 81
9 Paul Damper 25 19 30 74
10 Adrian Harvanko 24 26 24 74
11 Mark Parsons 26 23 19 68
12 Dave Verga 23 21 23 67
13 Ian Rowan 12 19 27 58
14 Bob Crouch 17 19 21 57
15 Steve Farley 19 13 24 56
16 Owen Callaghan 15 - 26 41

Total Lost Balls = 176
*Lost Ball Prediction. Winner - Barry England - 175

Euro Tour 2024 Chairman's Notes

Gentlemen, may I begin by explaining that following the wassap messages yesterday, I will leave the report of the Golf to our Captain Darren, as he loves the job so much!

I will mention in passing that the golf for me is best summed up by Shakespeare (of course) in his famous tomorrow and tomorrow and tomorrow speech: - Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player,
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more.
It is a tale full of sound and fury, told by an idiot, signifying nothing

I appreciate Macbeth was of course expounding on the meaning of life but it feels an awful lot like my first round, especially the poor player, full of sound and fury, told by an idiot and signifying nothing (I hope).

Anyway Day 1 Friday Departure

It seems a long time ago we all braved the challenges of the M25 only to end up at Spoons in Gatwick, full of stag and hen do’s and expectant tourists. We all made it, so far phase one was complete!
Uneventful flight, brief transfer (slight missing driver kafuffle) and phases two and three were being ticked. Check in and off to the bar and the outward-bound section was successfully completed, you were on your own now chaps Rowan tours was closed for the night.
Having scoped out pre tour, the best sources of eating and drinking following a brief stop at the soon to be too familiar Biddy Mulligan’s, we set off for the best restaurant in town, which my research had indicated was Figaro’s.
Naturally ten of us rolling towards it loudly, got us the expected response and we were unceremoniously sent away. The 200m walk from the pub had evidently proved too much for some of the weary travellers in our party and they stopped at the next available restaurant and mostly enjoyed their meal there, culminating in a shouting match of note from one unhappy (non) diner who had become over emotional. The remaining four of us wandered on and had a pleasant quiet meal on the beachfront, before all returning home fully feasted ready for a mornings golf.

Day 2

We done sum golfage (see captains report) n.b. this was not my finest hour.
Having had a ground recce of the local establishments rather than just a remote internet study, the entertainments subcommittee made a group booking for the 16 of us at the Chinese rat and sick shop, conveniently located a short walk from the increasingly popular Biddy Mullighans. By short walk it was the next set of tables.
Having lost two diners, Owen to Totters revenge and his floor swabber Tony Nightingale to carer mode, plus a couple who chose not to make the tortuous journey back down the mountain to base camp, it was just the 12 of us enjoying a lovely meal of a variety of deep-fried small animals accompanied by the occasional small schooner of Amontillado. Mr verga had been given some food tonight, so was calmer and at the end of the meal was entertaining a small family of bemused Belgium’s with some of his war stories and free brandy. Having rescued the whip, we began the now famous Rowan tours handicapping system of drinks of many flavours and colours.

Day 3

We done some Golfage again, it was sunny, see captains report.
Note to self; RT handicapping system epic fail, seeing double (s) must try harder our 3 ball looses 30 balls this round.
The dining subcommittee, imagining the previous evening had been a roaring success; and having spent a good half hour in front of, if not exactly studying the menu at Gousto, had selected this restaurant based on the fine rack of something and its proximity for weary travellers. Our opinion was matched by the others who also went to check out what was on offer.
Gousto was conveniently located a short walk from the increasingly popular Biddy Mullighans. By short walk it was the next set of tables (the other side this time). Having lost two, Owen to Totters revenge and his floor swabber Tony Nightingale to carer mode it was just the 14 of us again enjoying a lovely meal accompanied by the occasional small schooner of Amontillado.
Initially imagining sudden deafness, I did mention to the diners on my table that Dave had gone quiet. This was ominous.
As a time served ex roommate of the Verga I know this to be a dangerous sign, Silence occurs only before an unwelcome disaster of some sort, as even (especially) when asleep Dave is not quiet, it’s just not a gene he is blessed with, as anyone who has shared a golf course with him knows never mind a room. It may have been the sun, the altitude, the prawns, who knows but the horizontal hold had obviously broken and ice-skating Bambi Dave was back in town, culminating in the now famous Rover video which should be shown to every teenage boy enjoying his first woodpecker cider night out as a warning to their future.
Those who remained standing, sampled a variety of epic drinks in increasingly large volumes. Espresso martinis being a favourite in the Railway environment and vodka crème de menthe almost nowhere. Gary’s preference to have the air con on artic mode permanently, I took the prudent steps of choosing to remain fully dressed and only partly on the bed for the night.

Day 3 Vamos a la Playa

We done no golf we did other stuff.
Following breakfast, the drinking party from the previous evening sampled the delights of the Spa in an attempt to assuage some of the effects from the sesh of note. I was informed the steam room has a menthol additive which was a relief to me as I had assumed I was still sweating crème de menthe! Who knew throwing handfuls of ice at your friends dressed only in a nylon skullcap would be a thing! travel truly broadens the mind!
See wassap photo of Benny hill lookalike Mr K.
Other members of the party played wiff waff or some such on the hotel court which was evidently thrilling.
Steve decided to put a little bit of peace and quiet back into his life by setting off on a route march alone down the mountain. It seems, what feels like a two-minute journey when chatting in a cab on the way home, is an arduous two hour walk in the sun but at least is was peaceful.
Following our trip to the restorative spa the party then continued into town and the heartbreak of Biddys being closed, was just about offset by a trip to the beach and an ice cream. As a nod to permanent liver damage, I retired to the room hurt to wimp out. I’d let myself down, my roommate down and mags down and can only apologise for missing the afternoon sesh.
Dinner that evening was almost all of us again (see above) at the El Julietta grill just down the road (well about half hour for Steve) far too much glorious food later we all rolled back to the hotel much fuller. Dave had returned to full voice but still couldn’t tell a window from a mirror. Had biddy’s on the phone wondering where we were and did she have to send the additional six staff she had brought in for the night back home, if we weren’t all coming in drinking?

Day 4 The final countdown

Sport (and weather)
Boys done more golfage, scorchio.
It seems as though some of the beach had travelled up the hill to make it to our course today but I liked it as I got more than last two rounds added together.
A hale and hearty lunch was had by all on completion of our last round at La Carla and a couple of litres of sangria and a bottle of white later and the speeches were had, prizes awarded, 160 of the euros raised for charity and another lovely day had by all.
The rigours of the week firmly having taken hold, only a few battle-hardened recidivists descended to base camp, where as luck would have it Biddys was open, so somewhat ashamed by our absence the day before, we did our best to make good, then set off for our last supper.
Mr K had managed to blag a table for 6 at Figaro’s at last and we all thought it was worth the wait I think , some new experiences (Asparagus, no vouchers and the size of the bill) but a great time was had by all. As the cab rank was next to Biddys it was two or three for the road and we headed back up the hill for the last time.

Day 5 The wanderer returns

Other than a now customary delay (slight missing driver kafuffle) the return journey although spiced up by a long post Brexit queue for the non-Europeans, remained un eventful and I assume we all returned safe and sound, if somewhat weary from our exertions.
It just remains for me to give my heartfelt thanks to the touring party, firstly to my roomy Garry who had to act as personal carer on more than one occasion, top job my friend.
Paul Mark and Chris the only drivers I didn’t want to fold up and shove in a bin after 54 tee shots arsed up.
Owen of course, who I think we can safely assume certainly put more out than he put in that week. His nursing staff Tony who never wants to see another brown pebble dashed wall again.
In terms of the carers the Gold award it must go to steve “put me down for another lost ball” Farley who has provided a weeks respite care for Carol as he has had to look after our two Daves. Both the Dr Jekyll Delightful Daytime Dave and the Mr Hyde Noxious Nighttime Dave.
Of course, to the beast himself Rover Verga much love and thanks, these trips just wouldn’t be the same without you and I’d have nothing to write about!
Barry and Darren our captain, thanks for the entertainment and great company at more bars than were strictly necessary hope you continue to enjoy your report writing!
Adrian, you were astute enough to keep off the radar when the drinks were flowing but managed to leap in for the queue at the airport, good skills.
I love Mussels (sic) Tom who has shown age is no barrier to being a silly arse after a few Rowan special cocktails. Fair play son it must have been an awkward moment meeting the line up at Gatwick and you were regularly the only one who could get out of a seated position without making a noise!
Much love to another tour newbie, Pete Browning who seemed to slot right in with the drinking, cussing and general badinage but was too good at the golf to ever be in danger of us playing together but seemed to manage real well until that last round.
Bob C thank you for your joyous company in the group of death hardly a shot went by without one of us having a little sing and a dance. I think we have bought some much welcome employment to the ball finders of Mijas.
And last but not ever least, our scorer extraordinaire and handicap guru Pete “it’s alright lads I played this yesterday” Tweddell. A legend of the spreadsheet, I am very pleased we managed to give him a very close finish between four.
To sum up a great time with a brilliant bunch of lads with some golf occasionally emerging through the haze. Thank you all so much and a very big thank you from linda for the perfume she smells better already.
We always say never again and so far we have been wrong every time! This mostly down to the great support and thanks we receive and the fact Linda keeps wanting me to go away so I may as well have a great set of lads with me and evidently that means we have to take some bats along.
Stay posted for tour 25!

Euro Tour 2024 Captain's Report

Well gents, another great MAGS trip abroad. Thank you Ian and Linda for organising the trip and a very good one at that.
Thanks to all the guys that came and made the trip what it was, and I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did.

The American Course

Was very hard and not forgiving but in good condition. Was funny with the buggies not doing as they were told. LOL

The Europa Course

Another hard course but also in good condition. The lost ball count went up quite a bit on this one.

The Asia Course

Wasn't as bad in difficulty as we thought and the course was under preparation and not at it's best. The greens were very tricky.

The whole hotel and golf were looked after very well. I hope you all enjoyed it as much as I did?
Congratulations to:
Tom for winning in first place,
Gary for coming second,
and the winner of the money for lost balls, Barry England.

Thanks everyone
Your Captain, Darren

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